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Get Out of My Life, but First Could You Drive Me & Cheryl to the Mall: A Parent's Guide to the New Teenager, Revised and Updated | 
 enlarge | Author: Anthony E. Wolf
Publisher: Farrar, Straus and Giroux
Category: Book
List Price: $14.00
Buy New: $11.20
You Save: $2.80 (20%)
New (39) Used (34) Collectible (1) from $4.34
Rating:  101 reviews
Sales Rank: 3375
Media: Paperback
Edition: Revised
Number Of Items: 1
Pages: 240
Shipping Weight (lbs): 0.4
Dimensions (in): 8.1 x 5.4 x 0.7
ISBN: 0374528535
Dewey Decimal Number: 306.874
EAN: 9780374528539
ASIN: 0374528535
Publication Date: August 1, 2002
Shipping: Eligible for Super Saver Shipping
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Amazon.com Review
This is a survival guide for parents who find themselves marooned among volatile and incomprehensible aliens on Planet Teen. Area maps cover the obvious ground--there are chapters on school, sex, suicide, and so on--but it's the title of Chapter 2, "What They Do and Why," that best captures the book's spirit and technique. Anthony Wolf's modus operandi is not so much to make pronouncements about what parents should do, as to explain adolescent behavior in a way that's bound to leave parents with a changed view of the plausible options. Wolf is a clinical psychologist, and his writing is clear--even witty--and he doesn't resort to jargon. The expository text is punctuated with snatches of illustrative dialogue, which serve as concrete examples and help parents learn how to see, anticipate, and avoid "bad strategies." (One key mistake is getting dragged into no-win conflicts instead of having the wisdom to shut up at the moment when shutting up would be most effective--albeit the least satisfying--thing to do.) There are also some nicely tongue-in-cheek samples of "ideal" communication--the stuff we imagine might get said if only we were better parents. After one such rosily cooperative and considerate interchange between a father and his adolescent son, Wolf offers the following two-edged comfort: "The above conversation has never happened. Never. Not in the whole history of the world." Message: Parenting adolescents is inherently difficult. Don't judge your efforts by otherworldly standards. --Richard Farr
Product Description
A brand new edition of the bestselling guide to raising teenagersWhen Anthony E. Wolf's witty and compassionate guide to raising adolescents was first published, its amusing title and fresh approach won it widespread admiration. Beleaguered parents breathed sighs of relief and gratitude. Now Dr. Wolf has revised and updated his bestseller to tackle the changes of the past decade. He points out that while the basic issues of adolescence and the relationships between parents and their children remain much the same, today's teenagers navigate a faster, less clearly anchored world. Wolf's revisions include a new chapter on the Internet, a significantly modified section on drugs and drinking, and an added piece on gay teenagers. Although the rocky and ever-changing terrain of contemporary adolescence may bewilder parents, Get Out of My Life gives them a great road map.
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| Customer Reviews: Read 96 more reviews...
 Fantastic for parents of teens (and anyone who has regular contact with them)! October 22, 2008
1 out of 1 found this review helpful
As a clinical psychologist specializing in work with adolescents and families, I am always searching for information that will help parents better understand their children. This book has become an invaluable resource for allowing parents a window into the thoughts and emotions of their teens. Dr. Wolf does a wonderful job of explaining the gaps in communication and understanding that transpire on a daily (or more) basis without placing blame on either the parent or child. The reality is that teenagers, especially in this day and age, are struggling to straddle the line between childhood and adulthood. They face an overwhelming set of challenges in trying to balance expectations of peers, parents, and those placed by themselves. Further complicating matters, is the loss of ability to think beyond choices that will fill them with an immediate sense of competence. The more parents can understand these, as well as other, elements of adolescent development the easier it will be to maintain a sense of connection to their teens. This is not always an easy task. Thus, parents should feel comfortable to reach out for support from family, friends, therapists, etc. Ultimately, as Dr. Wolf highlights, parents who are able to whether the storm while balancing the teen's need for structure with the need for increased independence will ultimately see their teenagers become thriving, happy, caring, responsible young adults.
A must have book for parents of teenagers October 22, 2008
A wonderful book, I've told my friends to buy this book even before they get to the teenage years, it is a complete handbook for parents of adolescents. Wolf lives and works in USA but he might have been writing about my teenagers in Dublin, Ireland. It seems they are the same, the world over. I loved his explanation of why they hang out in gangs outside shops and now that I know, I view them differently! I put some of his suggestions in to practice and saw results within days. It's true what others say about this book, you will feel he has been evesdropping in your house.
 how to really talk to your teens August 25, 2008
wolf uses many examples of actual conversations between parent and teen and then re-writes these conversations as to how they should have played out. very helpful and insightful. easy for me to apply to my own negative outcomes with my teens.
Right on target! July 16, 2008
1 out of 3 found this review helpful
I found this book to be of great value in improving communication with my 9th grade daughter. I wish I had read it sooner!
 Where are the consequences? April 22, 2008
10 out of 10 found this review helpful
After several recommendations by friends with teens, I've almost finished this book after a couple of days of reading. Helpful points include the reminders to not engage in pointless arguments and to state my position clearly and concisely and not to lecture. My problem with the book is the lack of any apparent consequences for bad behavior. Teen comes in an hour past curfew? Re-state the appropriate curfew time and move on. Teen lies about grades on homework? Overlook the lie and re-state expectations about homework. Teen calls parent a f-ing b*tch? Ignore the name calling and remain silent. While I agree it creates ongoing conflict to call kids out on these behaviors and punish them, I think that is a necessary part of the landscape and to think otherwise is unrealistically permissive.
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